Rump Chat

The slimmer, sexier cousin of the Rumpus blog*.
Submit anonymous tips and get your campus gossip here. (If it's good enough, we'll even put your tips in our next issue.)

*No names will be published (defamation lawsuits, etc) without written consent of said person.

Anonymous reported: drunk British girl last night announcing "let's colonise Saybrook" #toosoon?

Way too soon.

Anonymous reported: What the fuck is this new printing system? WHY?

our theory: the replacement of UniPrint with BluePrint is yet another clever move in Salovey’s master plan to make Yale a world leader in both arbitrary computer cluster structures and tepid puns

Anonymous reported: Can someone write a summary called "what you missed over the summer" with bullet point changes to new haven? For instance I heard wall st pizza closed?? what??? Not all of us pay attention to happenings in new haven so it would be nice to have a list!

WHAT U MISSED IN THE WEEK YOU’VE BEEN BACK

  • WALL ST PIZZA IS BETTER THAN EVER I ATE THERE YESTERDAY
  • A1 PIZZA & EDUCATED BURGHER ARE CLOSED
  • DWIGHT HALL A CAPPELLA JAM (i’m just assuming, because no one should go to that ever)
  • LITERALLY PROBABLY EVERYTHING THAT’S HAPPENED ON CAMPUS IN THE PAST WEEK BECAUSE YOU’RE TOO LAZY TO WALK TO WALL ST. PIZZA AND SEE FOR YOURSELF, DUDE

Anonymous reported: THE WOMEN'S TABLE IS OVERFLOWING. WATER GETTING EVERYWHERE.

MUST SEE!!!: 21 YR .   O LD  HO T  CO-ED  MONU ME NT    G OES WILD!!! EXCLUSIVE!!!  

Anonymous reported: Susan Rice is on campus!! Saw her in between JE and Berkeley!

Condoleezza or bust

Also “between JE and Berkeley” is literally half of the Yale campus

Anonymous reported: Rump mama, heard someone on SCC will be getting all the Last Chance Dance lists for him and his friends to look over. Isn't that wack?

We’re just trying to find out why there were 10 cop cars outside of Toad’s last night (and someone in handcuffs)

Anonymous reported: Can you explain this high school intern thing with the YCC please?

We’re hearing rumors that the new YCC is planning to start a high school internship program and will be recruiting these new interns from local high schools*

*Local high schools probably meaning prep schools like Hopkins, lest they exploit the largely minority-heavy public high schools like Wilbur Cross. Private school biddies get all the fun. #RaceToTheTop

Anonymous reported: rump mama, does the ycc REALLY need high school interns? this is the yale college council not bain capital.

hahahahahhaha oh my god the yale college council is a nickelodeon teen drama.

Anonymous reported: What's up with this toilet paper shortage in Morse? THE STRUGGLE IS REAL

WILL THE NEW ADMINISTRATION INTRODUCE LUX 2-PLY TO OUR LIVING SPACES